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Well, now's about the time when everyone I know starts gettin' married
There's something about this kind of time in our lives
And as a result
People have been asking me, "Annie
Who's the kind of guy that's gonna make you his wife?"
So I tell them

He's got George Clooney's salt and pepper hair
But he can sing like John Legend
Dance like Fred Astaire, yeah
He's got all that 1940's Humphrey Bogart swag
And a voice like Benedict Cumberbatch
Benedict Cumberbatch"

Lyrics continue below...

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So poeple tell me
"Annie, that's great, but don't you want someone who's real?"
And I say
"I can't help it. I blame the media for the way
That I feel

He's gotta
Look like David Beckham in his underwear
But he's sweeter than that guy from Slumdog Millionaire
And I don't know why, but I always thought Bill Nye was cute
He's gotta have Neil deGrasse Tyson's mind and charm
But he's got Michael Phelps' body
Or Michael Phelps' arms
And just like Stephen Colbert
Oh, he keep makin' me laugh
In a voice like Benedict Cumberbatch
Benedict Cumberbatch
Benedict Cumberbatch

He's gotta be an iron chef
A pro athlete
He is Atticus Finch
With the senate seat
He's got Obama's smile
Doctor House's blue eyes
He's just about as righteous as
Jesus Christ
Okay, that last one's a stretch
I think I can probably deal with less
Than Jesus

But if I'm supposed to look like the girls in magazines
Well, I will hold men up to the standards
That they've set for me
So if you've gotta have your model
Then I've gotta have
Benedict Cumberbatch
Benedict Cumberbatch
I'll just take him in full
Forget everything I said before
Just him would be cool"
(But isn't he gonna get married?)
Oh ooh woah oh oh ooh
(Like have a baby and stuff?)
Oh oh oh oh oh

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