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CASINO GARDENS, owned and operated by mysterious skateboarding magnate G. Michael Cools since 1981, is the premiere vacation destination for families, businessmen and high-rollers the world round. Come see what we're all about! For the mermaids and mermen at heart we have two jumbo-size wading pools, a luxurious sauna and scuba lessons ran by internationally renowned experts!! For you tasty hunks we have the largest exercise complex in the state of Florida (tone up, zone out, right babe?). We haven't forgotten the big spenders either. With over

–INTERR)(@+8wUPTING (8*)$^T%lsj*)(RANSM$*)%ISSIO570kN–
no dudes you -have- forgotten the big spenders

half of em cant even leave the gardens after you sucked em dry

freakazoids standing on street corners asking for five dollar chips, pathetic

but fuck the big spenders man

who you really need to focus on is the easy sliders

we run the streets from the exercise lodge all the way down to valet parking

don't believe us? when was the last time someone made it through a vacation here? couples leaving trails of sunscreen and blood

if we dont get to em first its the arcade junkies, the dolphin tearz, the makeout bandits

its us gangs versus you

so you listen here Cools, we've all seen your pyramid tattoo, we know who you run with, we're not scared

your times up spaz

so when you hear the sound of our wheels, you better run

easy sliders out
– –

two hundred tables and Japanese-imported virtual slot machines we're sure you'll find a game that's just right for you! So the next time you're planning a getaway, think Casino Gardens. The next time you need to escape from your nine to five to relax with loved ones, Casino Gardens.

~Love from inside the motherboard~


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