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Pistol Whipped

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Biography

Comprised of three robotic chimpanzees, Pistol Whipped emerged fully formed from an electrical outlet in northern British Columbia on February 30, 2013. Lineup includes Rae The Random (Cell Phone, Cello), Kai The Great (Trumping, Trumpet.) and Sie The Silent (Bowling Balls, Vocals)

Their drummer is a bovine. A Bovine with a fancy Tophat. And a cigar, but the robots disapprove of that. :(

…Except for Sie The Silent. She’s a bad girl. (This is a lie. Made up by Kai. And this is a Rhyme. Made up by I.)

Kai The Great has always been the most talented of the robots. (Also the most delusional.)

However, if any of the robots has any defining trait, it’s Rae The Random’s compulsive lying. No one knows for sure whether it’s in her programming or she just enjoys the rush of spewing bullshit from her jawhole (It wouldn’t be the only jawhole-related rush she indulges in) (But Kai is the proffesional fluffer of the group.)

It’s the bullshit spewing. Though, her compulsive lying isn’t as serious as Kai’s severe cases of Herpes, ghonorreah, and crabs, which she received while being “assaulted” in her sleep by Rae, who in turn, received by being assaulted by Steve Jobs’ newest version of Safari.

Of course, Sie has had her own relationship problems, mostly caused by on-off lightswitch Joe Momma.

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