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From the ashes of the Rabble Rousers, one of the most legendary hip-hop groups in West Virginia rose the Dinosaur Burps. Consisting of B. Rude and Vivid Hues on the mic, and DJ Sour Sqweazle on the 1 (not 1’s and 2’s, the 1), the Burps are one of the hardest touring and hardest partying groups in the state, and perhaps the stratosphere. They were both members of the thrash punk band ‘Mario Van Peeballs’ and the George Thorogood and the Destroyers cover band ‘Jorge Thorohood and the Breakers of Stuff.’ As the legend goes, they have been asked to leave, but then let back in the next day at the same bar a total of 836 consecutive days in a row, and invented the words “shit” and “fuck.” They once skunked Darth Vader and Emperor Palpatine 11-0 in a table tennis championship game, but since skunking is not an official rule they actually went on to beat them 21-0. Inspired by the Canadian duo the Queef Sisters, they are occasionally joined by Mic Rude and L-NO to form the Dinosaur Queefs, and in this incarnation once broke a good friend out of prison using nothing but a laser pointer and a rogue circus elephant. It is also common knowledge amongst the hill people that 80-90% of things attributed to Chuck Norris or that guy from the Dos Equis commercials were in fact done by the Dinosaur Burps. Everyone’s biting their shit.

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