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Craig Template


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craig template had a happy childhood despite the tragic success of his parents suicide pact. after a 3 month spending spree during which template squandered all 2 million of the generous insurance payout, he found himself washed up in hollywood, making ends meet by becoming a bit part actor, appearing in ‘annie 2: part 2’ alongside the then unknown “betty curse”.

just as his acting career was on the up, the studio doctors daily cocktail of prescription meds & prayer sessions could no longer supress the onset of puberty, forcing template to bind his chest and undergo a humiliating waxing process.

no longer a castrato, template lost his promised role in michael winners ‘farinelli’. this combined with the blow of losing his coveted september slot in that years pirelli calendar, led template to move back to britain, where enfant terrible ken russell offered him shelter at his cumbrian farmhouse retreat. sadly this arrangement was not to work as template was forced to take the lead role in russells critically condemned ‘the rape of beethoven’, filmed in the farmhouse garden and surrounding hills.

template had hit rock bottom. things finally came to a head when touring with a production of ‘the 3 sisters’ template deliberately set fire to co-stars marian margolis & lesley joseph during the 2nd encore.

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  • Lotionmotion

    Patrick was sooooooooo mesmerising! His outfits were daring. This ugly blond crossdresser was trying too hard. Singing was just AWFUL too. Hope he doesn't rely on this for an income...

    13 Mar 2009 Reply
  • clockworkpurple

    Saw him live last night, and I can honestly say it was the WORST live act I have ever seen. So at least he excels at something...

    10 Mar 2009 Reply
  • britishbear

    It's a bit erm.....a bit like having a gay teenager sing Billy Piper songs.

    4 Mar 2009 Reply
  • twotwo9


    7 Dec 2008 Reply
  • Desolation

    at first i thought what the hell is this crap?! but then the next day i couldn't get last night out of my head and now i'm addicted. sigh i hope bloody chamber music releases some really talented people rather than just patrick's friends.

    12 Nov 2007 Reply

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