Recent Bedroom (3:48)

“Recent Bedroom”, the lyrics deal directly, really minimally, with a specific experience I had when my aunt died a few years ago. I was with my family, and we were in her bedroom, and it was evening— dusk. She was in her bedroom, and everybody knew she was about to pass away, and she went out, she faded out, and everybody just started crying. It’s one of the few times in my life I’ve seen my dad actually break down into tears. I walked outside, because I was a little overwhelmed, and I tried to cry to myself. But I couldn’t. I could not cry. And— I’m not trying to present the lyrics, but it’s like— I didn’t know why. I didn’t know why I couldn’t cry. I didn’t know why I was lacking the emotion. This is a period when I was very involved in drugs; I felt like I’d killed off my childhood instinct, which would’ve been to cry. I felt like I’d hollowed myself out, and I felt empty. It’s a song about emptiness, and moving from childhood to adolescence, and just that first transition where you start to feel a little bit emotionally vacant and detached. -Bradford Cox