The Bible is kvlt

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Created on: 26 Jan 2009
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God is the real Satan

GOD wants Slavery:


If a man beats his male or female slave with a rod and the slave dies as a direct result, he must be punished, but he is not to be punished if the slave gets up after a day or two, since the slave is his property. Exodus 21:20-2

GOD wants war and the killing of innocent:

This is what the LORD Almighty says: 'I will punish the Amalekites for what they did to Israel when they waylaid them as they came up from Egypt. Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy everything that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.'Samuel 15:2,3

Samaria shall become desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up. Hosea 13:16

GOD wants you to beat your children:

Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. Proverbs 22:15

Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.Proverbs 19:18

Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.Proverbs 23:13,14

GOD wants you to torture people:

And he brought forth the people that were therein, and put them under saws, and under harrows of iron, and under axes of iron, and made them pass through the brick-kiln: and thus did he unto all the cities of the children of Ammon. 2 Samuel 12:3

And he brought out the people that were in it, and cut them with saws, and with harrows of iron, and with axes. Even so dealt David with all the cities of the children of Ammon. 1 Chronicles 20:3

Note that GOD says about David: "I have found David the son of Jesse, a man after mine own heart, which shall fulfil all my will." in Acts 13:22

And I contended with them, and cursed them, and smote certain of them, and plucked off their hair, and made them swear by God, saying, Ye shall not give your daughters unto their sons, nor take their daughters unto your sons, or for yourselves. Nehemiah 13:25

Even Jesus often spoke of how to torture his enemies:

And he saith unto him, Friend, how camest thou in hither not having a wedding garment? And he was speechless. Then said the king to the servants, Bind him hand and foot, and take him away, and cast him into outer darkness, there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. Matthew 22:12-13

And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors. Matthew 18:34

The lord of that servant will come in a day when he looketh not for him, and at an hour when he is not aware, and will cut him in sunder, and will appoint him his portion with the unbelievers. And that servant, which knew his lord's will, and prepared not himself, neither did according to his will, shall be beaten with many stripes. Luke 12:46-48

And look what GOD has planned for you at the end of the world:

And to them it was given that they should not kill them, but that they should be tormented five months: and their torment was as the torment of a scorpion, when he striketh a man. And in those days shall men seek death, and shall not find it; and shall desire to die, and death shall flee from them. Revelation 9:5-6

Exactly, he doesn't even let you die, he wants to torture you as long es possible.

GOD also wants you to fuck your daughter(s):


And Lot went up out of Zoar, and dwelt in the mountain, and his two daughters with him; for he feared to dwell in Zoar: and he dwelt in a cave, he and his two daughters. And the firstborn said unto the younger, Our father is old, and there is not a man in the earth to come in unto us after the manner of all the earth: Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. And they made their father drink wine that night: and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. And it came to pass on the morrow, that the firstborn said unto the younger, Behold, I lay yesternight with my father: let us make him drink wine this night also; and go thou in, and lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. And they made their father drink wine that night also: and the younger arose, and lay with him; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father. And the first born bare a son, and called his name Moab: the same is the father of the Moabites unto this day. And the younger, she also bare a son, and called his name Benammi: the same is the father of the children of Ammon unto this day. Genesis 19:30-38

Note that the above was under full approval of THE LORD and would make a good basis of a hentai-doujin.

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  • slawomiro

    Words out of context can do wonders. [2] I bet whoever made this collection of quotes didn't even bother to check the whole scripture. But, of course, it's better to quote some (ir)rational sites instead of reading articles by theologians or doing any other research. Who cares, "I'm open minded and logical hurr durr!"

    27 Feb 2014 Reply
  • Kirowatt

    10/10 group.

    20 Apr 2013 Reply
  • hauzzer

    Words out of context can do wonders.

    10 Apr 2013 Reply
  • Dukizz

    You people will be so sorry for this... trust me.

    22 Aug 2010 Reply
  • Rataii

    OMFG I've never knew the true glory of GOD. THANK YOU.

    9 Apr 2010 Reply
  • ImDaneCook

    Jesvs Khrist

    3 Aug 2009 Reply
  • meisterdreister

    god is a very cool guy who doesn't afraid of anything

    3 Feb 2009 Reply
  • aVoiDer

    CHRISTIANITY IST KRIG!1

    28 Jan 2009 Reply
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