Homer Simpson » Discussions

Homer's Quotes

 
    • [Deleted user] said...
    • User
    • 23 Sep 2007, 21:30
    Alright Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.

    AHHH. Donuts. . . What can't they do.

  • Its not easy to supprise your old man... OMG a blue car!!

    • [Deleted user] said...
    • User
    • 26 Mar 2008, 22:00
    I can't take his money. I can't print my own money. I have to work for money. Why don't I just lie down in the road and die!

    • [Deleted user] said...
    • User
    • 30 Mar 2008, 13:08
    Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware, it carries a terrible curse!
    Homer: Oohh, that's bad.
    S: But it comes with a free frogurt!
    H: That's good.
    S: The Frogurt is also cursed.
    H: That's Bad.
    S: But you get your choice of topping.
    H: That's good.
    S: The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
    H: .......
    S: That's bad.
    H: Can I go now?

    not really a quote, but still funny :)

    • Bornica said...
    • User
    • 2 Apr 2008, 22:52
    From now on I'll be know as Homer...Jay Simpson!

    Remember when you were young?

    You shone like the sun.
  • Singin on the Flinstons' Theme:
    Simpson! Homer Simpson!
    He's the greatest guy in history
    from the town of Springfield
    he's about to hit a chestnut tree!

    *crashes*

    ...I'll see you on the dark side of the moon...
    • [Deleted user] said...
    • User
    • 9 Jul 2008, 06:47
    Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
    Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
    Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product.
    Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy?
    Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
    Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
    Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out.
    Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said.
    Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
    Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to.
    Homer: Bart, go to your room.

  • Marge: Homer, the plant called. They said if you don't show up tomorrow don't bother showing up on Monday.
    Homer: Woo-hoo. Four-day weekend.

  • Homer's toast:

    To alcohol! The cause of ... and the solution to... all of life's problems!

  • I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!

  • This is great:

    All right, brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.

  • I got one as my signature below.

    When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something. Homer Simpson is my hero
    • [Deleted user] said...
    • User
    • 27 Jun 2009, 23:06
    niemirycz escribió:
    Its not easy to supprise your old man... OMG a blue car!!


    LOOOOOOOOOOL
    It's hard to choose, but this one makes me laugh
    "Trying is the first step towards failure"

    • [Deleted user] said...
    • User
    • 15 Aug 2009, 18:22
    If Bart can be El Barto, i can be El Homo

  • 1) Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?
    Homer: Yes. (lie dectector blows up)

    2) Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.

    3) (drunk) Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.

    I like my coffee hot and strong. Just like I like my women, hot and strong. With a SPOON in them.
  • don't worry its an all terrain vehicle

    • Ches182 said...
    • User
    • 28 Sep 2011, 11:52
    [looking out of the window during snow storm]
    "See, Lisa, looks like tomorrow I'll be shoveling ten feet of global warming."

    Collecting flags - please visit ;-)
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