The Greatest Religion Quotes

Quoth TambourineBlues:
Remember when God impregnated that teenage girl without telling her while she was asleep? That's kind of fucked up.
Were you referring to the story of Mary?

Quoth TambourineBlues:
Yeah, dude, I'm about ninety nine percent sure that if that happened, she was already pregnant. I mean, Elizabeth was already six months along when she found out, according to the BIBLE, and God didn't even tell her, he told Mary. Therefore, God = Date Rapist trying to cover his own tracks with a verse. Also, none of this matters because it's all bullshit.

Elizabeth's baby John was from Zechariah, the way I understand it.

You guys disgust me. Seriously, as if Christmas and Christianity were about that.

It's about buying more sweaters and beating up gay people, respectively.

I'm fond of the one in my sig.

Quoth wimme:
The "fairy tales" we were discussing were written by a medical doctor, who may have been alive when Jesus was born.


A medical doctor who may have been alive when Jesus was born wrote the bible? Are we talking about Luke? Luke who had nothing to do with Jesus until he became his disciple? Did Luke bang some rocks together and figure out that Jesus was born from a virgin? What kind of proof are you offerring up, because until you can give me something from a third party source, not the Bible, I'm going to dismiss you. And I don't know what random incest verses have to do with anything, especially because you're not proving that they actually happened, which basically DOES make them fairytales.

As for my "rage and insults and blah blah blah", it's the internet. Lighten up.

please post more one-liners. all those posts are just way too long.

Quoth akaCallMeKiller:
I'm fond of the one in my sig.
Nice one! You can read about the end of the Church Age in Revelation. This is either about to happen soon or already going on.

The path of the righteous man...

Maybe the third sin was "trying to be sassy", which is a sin by association with sassy gay sidekicks in sitcoms.

"And God said unto Moses: 'Gimme the remote, Will & Grace is on.'"

Quoth ratnerstar:
Quoth wimme:
Quoth lbf:
...
It's about buying more sweaters and beating up gay people, respectively.
Thank you for stereotyping 3 sins in one breath, lbf! It shows how much we have "civilized" sin in our own human way instead of dealing with it the way we were told to.

1) Beating people up,
2) Being gay,
3) Buying sweaters?


Behold! The Holy Spirit came on ratnerstar!

I should have said "3 manifestations of sin", rather than "sins".
Example: Beating up people is a manifestation of sin. The hate, a lack of forgiveness or whatever reason for beating someone up is the sin.

This difference is important: there can be laws against manifestations of sin (Moses), but not against sin itself (since Jesus we have "grace"). This example will make you understand the usually so poorly understood Romans chapters 5, 6 and 11.

Buying a sweater is not sinful, far from it. On the other hand, excessive consumption, collecting riches and the like, are often manifestations of sin.

Just as for beating someone up, being gay can be the result of numerous different kinds of sin, be aware of this, instead of beating them up!

But if instead of dealing with sin, one would say "hey, what's the harm in buying a sweater and the other says : "what's the harm in enjoying this or that?" Well indeed, there is no harm at all if this behaviour was not the result of sin.
How can someone still blame gay people for saying: "Hey, what's the harm? I was born like that!"? If everyone is ignoring his own sin, because the manifestations of it are not against the law, why shouldn't you grant gay people that same right?

Everyone's a sinner. And everyone has the choice to deal with them or to ignore them. Let him who has eyes, open them now! The Bible did have things to teach us!

maybe this has been commented on before, but this topic seems to have been created by a non-physical entity

The part that confused me is Noah and the flood. If it was just Noah's family that survived wouldn't that mean that rebuilding the human race consisted of a TON of incest for a few generations? Maybe that's where the term "Mother-Fucker" came from.

It seems so ironic when Noah's family had to leave Gomorrah because they we're doing sinful things like mother-fucking then god put them in a situation where they had to do the same.

If incest causes birth defects, genetic mutation would explain why people of the time lived for 800 years. But the length of life would be offset by the incredible mental retardation of generations of inbreeding. I’m sure the average life-span was about the same from offset of accidental deaths of retarded inbred children.

Quoth wimme:
Just as for beating someone up, being gay can be the result of numerous different kinds of sin, be aware of this, instead of beating them up!

How can someone still blame gay people for saying: "Hey, what's the harm? I was born like that!"? If everyone is ignoring his own sin, because the manifestations of it are not against the law, why shouldn't you grant gay people that same right?

Everyone's a sinner. And everyone has the choice to deal with them or to ignore them. Let him who has eyes, open them now! The Bible did have things to teach us!

Hey guess what? You're a dumbass.